Little Old Cranky Man Who is Getting Too Smart to be a Dog

Little Old Cranky Man (a/k/a Dog) is back at it again (like he ever stops). Dog knows my routine.  The alarm is what alerts him to what type of day “he” will be having.  Imagine the following being said by Dog:

If the day starts with the alarm, then Human will be leaving soon and I have to wait as will be getting my post-breakfast treats just before she gets in her vehicle. {Sigh}  If the day starts with Human sleeping in with no alarm, then she is not going anywhere anytime soon and I will get my post-breakfast treats ASAP.  YES!  I now get my treats immediately after coming inside from doing my bizness so Human can settle in with her pjs, coffee, news, and laptop because in the past I drove her absolutely batty until she gave me my yum-yums!!!

Apparently, he now knows that he will be alone inside all day if I awake by the alarm AND it is cold outside. How do I know this?  He went outside this morning and stayed and stayed and stayed.  I drank a cup of coffee while waiting for him to return to the door.  After about 15-20 minutes, I looked outside and there he was, just lying there with no intention of going anywhere.


[Note: Normally, he goes out to do his bizness immediately after breakfast and is back at the door within about 15 minutes or so and even quicker if it is cold outside!  Not only is he a Little Old Cranky Man, but, apparently, he is now a little old cranky “thin-blooded” man!  He freezes if the wind blows! (This breaks my heart when I try to get him warmed up.)]

 So, what do I do? I call him.  And I get his Stank Eye look.  dog-stank-eye



I call again – C’mon Bud, it’s cold out! Let’s go. His response?  He turns his head like “I can’t hear you!”  And ears peeled back!



I am trying to get to work at a decent time. Get your butt up and get in here now!  What do I get?  “NO!”




After a few more minutes of calling and tempting with Yum Yum treats, Little Old Cranky Man decides to get up and lollygag on up and come inside. His lollygag is another five minute ordeal.  This is because he has very little pep in his step left.  He saves that pep for deer runs, squirrel runs, visiting friends, and when he has been inside all day and shoots out the door as soon as I open it.  These are short runs and jumps by the way which, sadly, are all that he can muster anymore.

I finally get him inside and I am dressed, armed with all the bags (lunch, purse, kitchen sink), grab  his “guilt good-bye treats” when he tries to bolt for the door! Oh no! Park it buddy and get comfy!  You aren’t going anywhere.  Have a great day Buddy!  See ya this afternoon.  Yep, there’s that Stank Eye look again!


Darned Little Ol’ Cranky Men!!


Ya Gotta Laugh!

 Aunt Maxine

2 thoughts on “Little Old Cranky Man Who is Getting Too Smart to be a Dog

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