Hitting Two Birds with One Stone …

WHOA PETA Members/Supporters/Organizers, STOP!  Slow down and don’t go there – this is only a figure of speech – an Ol’ Southern cliché. No one (that I am aware of at least) is trying, much less able, to hit two birds with one stone.  I mean, seriously, I can barely knock down one bowling pin with a bowling ball.  So, let’s continue on.

You know that moment when you realize you should have listened to Him (Him being God) and didn’t? Yeah, well, that moment hit me this morning like an iron skillet upside the head (again, figure of speech.  Darn!  I know now what manufacturers feel like with all of their warning signs on products, i.e., an Iron: WARNING!  Hot when plugged in!  (Ya think?)  SQUIRREL!


Yep, I keep getting off track – it is in my DNA.   [See the past Squirrel blog.]

God did everything BUT hit me on the head with an iron skillet this morning trying to tell me not to go my normal route to work. But, did I listen?  Noooooooooo … not me!  What do I do instead? I ended up going around the world and being about 15 minutes late(r) to work.  I am so thankful Boss is not a morning person either and was out of town today!

It was one of those mornings when I just couldn’t get it together after a very busy and stressful past two weeks. All I wanted to do was crawl back under the covers and sleeeeeeeep!  My “normal” arrival time to work is 9 a.m. give or take a few or more minutes. (I get this from my mom who was never on time anywhere!)  I was in a mental fog.  My mascara disappeared and I still have no clue to where.  I just used it yesterday and keep all of my makeup items in one cosmetic bag.  My coffee kept spilling out of my sippy cup – yes, I am even messy with a sippy cup! Ugh.  And I didn’t change from my black flipflop sandals to a more office-appropriate pair even for Casual Friday.  And all of this before I even got to the vehicle.

Once inside the vehicle, my phone (“Mr. Siri” with an Australian male voice – oooh la la) automatically phone lights up with – “27 minutes to work via T-ville Road” and then the GPS (“Mr. Geeps”) picks up and tries to tell me to do the same route.  Um …. Thinking …. Mmmm … No.  I hate that route.  But, here I was thinking Mr. Geeps was just trying to tell me which route would be quickest.  Little did I know IT was right, but not due to the route itself!

[Note: T-ville Road is not my favorite route as it is multi-lanes of bumper-to-bumper, dog eat dog inconsiderate drivers.   My peaceful mood is no longer by the time I arrive at my destination when I take that route.  I prefer the scenic countryside, two-lane canopy roads route where drivers are actually allowed to go slow because you cannot move from/to any other lane and no passing is allowed due to the curvy road.]

So, I decide to not listen to Mr. Siri  or Mr. Geeps as when I approached the end of the driveway, what do I see to the right but a schoolbus stopped picking up neighborhood kids. Mmmm… nope, need to beat the schoolbus out which is going my normal route, so I take off out of the driveway telling Mr. Siri and Mr. Geeps,  no thank you, but I have this one.   I can hear them both saying, “Yeah, not so fast Missy!  You are going to regret this one!”  Whatever!

Off I go taking my normal scenic route and it has limited traffic (probably due to the schoolbus holding everyone up).   Then it happens!  I see flashing blue lights ahead of the all of the red brake lights that are lining up behind as well.  Oh Snap!  Seriously?  No biggie.  The LE Officer will re-route the traffic around the auto accident one lane at a time.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t happening anytime soon.  No oncoming traffic is getting through other than those drivers in line who are now doing a 10-point turn (with these small lanes and deep drop-offs, 3 point turns aren’t always possible) and going a different route.   I now do my 10-point turn and go back through a large subdivision that apparently everyone else is doing as well since the main roads are backing up.

Well, it wasn’t Mr. Siri or Mr. Geeps trying to tell me – it was GOD using them as his transmittors! Now, I normally try to listen to Him when He is trying to get my attention.  But, for some reason this morning, He wasn’t getting through.  And God tried to tell me TWICE!  Take the T-ville Road route!  Take the T-ville Road route!!!   My child, next time you will listen to Me.  Yes sir.

I finally arrive to work 15 minutes “later” than I normally arrive. If I had only listened to Him … sigh

And the two birds with one stone? God not only helped me with fodder for The Blog, but maybe saved me from being involved in an accident.   Thank you God.

P.S. And, too, maybe He was helping me to be safe by allowing me to be in a mental fog this morning preventing me from leaving earlier and being involved in that accident.  (Hopefully no one was injured and my prayers are with any and all involved.)

Happy Friday!  Time to do the HaPpY DaNcE!

Ya Gotta Laugh!

Aunt Maxine

3 thoughts on “Hitting Two Birds with One Stone …

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